New Psychology Today Blog on Polyamory at Work


In my most recent blog on Psychology Today I explore the reasons why people might to come as polyamorous out at work — or not — the issues it might bring up, and how to deal with them.




Dr. Elisabeth Sheff, PhD, CASA, CSE

One of a handful of global experts on polyamory and the foremost international expert on children in polyamorous families, Dr. Elisabeth Sheff has studied gender and
families of sexual minorities for the last 16 years. Sheff’s television appearances include CNN, and the National Geographic, and she has given more than 20 radio, podcast, print, and television interviews with sources from Radio Slovenia to National Public Radio, the Sunday London Times to the Boston Globe and Newsweek. By emphasizing research methodology and findings in her discussions, Dr. Sheff presents the kind of public intellectualism that encourages audience members to think critically regarding gender, sexualities, and families.

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  1. I am interested in this because my partner and I have been exploring non-monogamy. We are very clear that we don’t want to be poly-amorous, because we take that to mean that we can go off and have relationships with other people and we want relationship monogamy. However, we decided to explore sexual non-monogamy in various forms, because we have high libidos and wanted to explore our fantasies with real people. We are both treading lightly because there is much to lose when we screw up. I have a tendency towards jealousy and there are certain gestures that I find to be very intimate, and I do not want our emotional and intimate relationship to include others. For instance, I have seen him holding hands with other women and gazing into their eyes, and that sends me into a tailspin and fights ensue. I’m very curious to find out how other people handle these things. We almost split up because of this last incident because I felt disrespected; I felt that he did not honor my boundaries and wishes. I’m not certain how I feel about moving forward with this, but now I feel that since we’ve opened the door, it might be difficult to close it. Also,I totally understand the need to stay closeted. And for that reason, I will not be signing this.

  2. Hello Elisabeth – Can you help us to find a number of how many are polyamorous in the USA? Can anybody else help?

    1. Hi Gregor, The best answer I have formulated so far is here

      I recently read some research, I think it was Terri Conley at the University of Michigan but I am not sure right now,that showed some incredibly high number of people had been in a consensually non-monogamous relationship at some point in their lives. Reading that research made me want to update that post on Psych Today, but I was involved in something else at the time and have not yet gotten to it. So thanks for the poke, I am happy to get to that post as soon as I finish these other 253 things 🙂

      If you beat me to it and find the Conley research on lifetime engagement in CNM, please send me the cite.



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