Audience Member Testimonial


Testimonial from an audience member at the Center for Alternative Lifestyles

As a relatively new member of the local kink community, I have encountered many situations involving varying degrees of consensual non-monogamy in different relationships. But as a single working mother of two children, I am constantly plagued by custody concerns, their emotional health, finding life balance and deciding on who to disclose to. After attending a weekend of sessions presented by Dr. Sheff, I feel better educated and at ease with my lifestyle choices and finding balance in my decisions.


Eli Sheff is the best presenter I’ve had the privilege of seeing in a long time. I really enjoyed her presentations not only because they were informative and valuable, but because Eli is a PHENOMENAL speaker. As an expert in Polyamory, she was able to back her information with good hard facts and a lot of research. She not only engaged everyone in the audience on multiple levels, but also facilitated the questions and comments in a respectful manner. Her sessions were valuable to anyone in any alternative lifestyle. I found myself relating the information to many different relationships I have at work, in play, and at home.


I wholeheartedly recommend her as a presenter for anyone looking for someone with excellent public speaking skills. She’s experienced with a wide variety of topics, which will allow her to engage with your entire audience. She does NOT disappoint!


-HW, attendee at one of the Center for Alternative Lifestyle sessions in Denver, 2016

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Filed under Client Testimonials, consensual nonmonogamy, diversity, non-monogamy, open relationships, Polyamory, relationships, sex, sex education, sexuality, social equality

InfinityCon this weekend



The inaugural meeting of InfinityCon happens this weekend at the Crowne Plaza Atlanta-Airport hotel at 1325 Virginia Avenue, Atlanta, GA 30344.

I am thrilled to be giving the keynote address. My schedule is here and you can buy tickets here   and you can find the master schedule here.

Day passes are available at the door for $50.

I hope to see you there!

For Eli’s schedule see

and for tickets see



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The Center for Alternative Lifestyles Hosts Dr. Eli Jan. 30 & 31



If you are going to be in the Denver area January 30 and 31, consider joining me with the Center for Alternative Lifestyles for a weekend of talks on consensual non-monogamies and their related social and legal issues.


Saturday January 30, 2016

10 – 11:30: Types of Consensual Non-Monogamy and When they Work

12:30 – 2pm: Polyamorous Families with Children

2:30 – 4pm: The Importance of Polyaffectivity to Resilient CNM Families

Sunday January 31, 2016

10 – 11:30: Legal Issues Facing Sexual Minority Families and How to Handle Them

12:30 – 2pm: Sexual Variation vs. Paraphilia and Pathology: Changes in the DSM5

2:30 – 4pm: The Pleasures and Dangers of Unicorn Hunting


Venue:   Denver’s Dangerous Theatre

Venue Phone: 303-922-0068


2620 West 2nd Avenue, #1, Denver, Colorado, 80219, United States
For more information see
I hope to see you there!

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New Research on Polyamorous Families Underway

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If you are a member of a polyamorous family, consider participating in Marco Lenzi’s research project on teens’ perceptions of family life. See his blurb below:

Hello, my name is Marco Lenzi and I am an Italian student of Clinical Psychology at Università Cattolica Del Sacro Cuore in Milan. I am conducting a project research about polyamory, and in particular investigating how boys and girls from 14 to 18 years old perceive quality of life and their relationships within their poly families. The research comprehends an interview face-to-face about life in poly family which will last no more than one hour. The project was approved by Professor of Sociology Elisabetta Carrà in Università Cattolica and I’ll furnish informed consent to the teenagers’ parents.
For further information, you can contact me at
Thanks for your attention.

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When your partner wants non-monogamy and you DONT



My most recent blog on Psychology Today tackles the challenges people often experience when they find themselves in a mixed orientation relationship in which one person wants monogamy and the other wants polyamory.

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Filed under Blog, consensual nonmonogamy, Families, non-monogamy, open relationships, Polyamory, Psychology Today, relationships, romance, sex, sexuality, Uncategorized

Who Counts as a Parent in a Polyamorous Family?

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In my new blog on Psychology Today I examine who children in poly families see as parents, how they decide, and what the kids call their parental figures.

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InfinityCon Presentations February 6 and 7

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With fabulous altsex folks like Cunning Minx, Franklin Veaux, Eve Rickert, and Marla Stewart,  InfinityCon is coming to the Crowne Plaza Hotel near the Atlanta airport. I am thrilled to be presenting the keynote address Alternative Families, Cultural Influences, and Chosen Kinship at 5pm on Saturday, February 6. My other presentations are on Friday February 5, with Polyamorous Families with Children from 1 t0 1:50pm, and Boundaries for Leadership in Altsex Communities with Eve Rickert from 3 to 3:50. Also, I present Correcting Assumptions: Differentiating between BDSM and Intimate Partner Violence with Rachel Kieran on Saturday from 2 to 2:50.

Registration is open, so please join us for great conversations, the opportunity to learn new skills, and the chance to attend fun con events like the Black Tie Poly Prom, a pajama party movie night, and  an evening with Taloolah Love and the Atlanta Speakeasy Electroswing.


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